In the past week nearly everyone I know has asked how my mother’s day went. These days to me it is just another day. When my daughter was small it was easier and magical; a hand-made card and her beaming up at me with her great big smile while we made breakfast together would keep my heart happy and full. As she grew up, those hand-made gifts were less frequent, more times it was replaced by a store bought card, a sweet thought indeed, but she spent less time with me even on mother’s day and the magic slowly faded. I got married and started to hope for movie-quality surprises of breakfast in bed and a day of ultimate pampering, none of which were at all realistic. As the years went on, even though I dropped hints about wanting surprises, surprises and BIG DAYS were just not what my darling husband was good at. After many years of getting my hopes up for big surprises and BIG DAYS, I grew tired of being sorely frustrated and disappointed and so I gave up hoping for anything other than just another day. Some would call it picking your battles, perhaps it is just growing older and wiser.
So I try not to get too disappointed by holidays or special days any more, since I know they are almost always going to be a disappointment. They used to be full of surprises and what I perceived as grand adventures when my daughter was smaller, but these days there are no more surprises, home-made cards, no special treats or outings, no bubbling little bundle of joy around that is more excited about it than I am, mostly they are just another day and more work to do.
If I had to figure out why or what changed, I would say part of it I guess it that my daughter has grown up and is no longer living at home and part of it is that my idea of enjoying a holiday usually involves celebrating in the tackiest way possible ( lots of fanfare and decorations, the more homemade the better), going outdoors to have adventures (making snowmen, kayaking, camping) and getting surprises, all quite the opposite of what my husband perceives as a relaxing time. All that fuss seems to stress him out. There is a little part of me that wishes for a grand gesture and while I know it won’t really happen, I try not to get overly frustrated by this any more. Maybe I just gave up or got tired of being disappointed.
So, much like the past 10 years of mother’s day, this one has been just another mother’s day. Nothing incredible or special, although I was treated to my favorite mother’s day treat of a bagel with cream cheese, salmon, tomatoes and cucumbers. Also had some strawberries and tried to put just a touch of Nutella on them and found that to be delicious!
Spent a good part of the day cleaning the house, another smaller part of it “typing”. I did take some time to work on a little sewing project and finally made one of the sleep sacks I have been meaning to make for weeks. I found that I can do it while relaxing and watching a show on Netflix (currently watching Lost), so I think I’ll get through a few more tomorrow when I take my daily lunch break with a bit of TV.